It’s safe to say that the way younger generations view marriage continues to drastically shift. What once used to be mostly necessary, expected, and the status quo, marriage is now seen as an autonomous choice; it’s become as much of a logical decision as it is an emotional one. So if the world is changing how we view marriage, why would we still benefit from something like premarital therapy? We get it! It somehow seems...old-fashioned? Hear us out for a sec. Here are some top benefits of premarital therapy.
You and your partner will gain communication skills.
Working with a therapist will give you a neutral party present while you talk with one another. The way each of us communicates is deeply personal, and sometimes our unique ways of hearing and speaking differ too much. A therapist has the training and experience to help bridge any potential communication issues you may have or face in your relationship. Not only do you inevitably gain better communication skills, but you also gain compassion and better understanding of your partner. Increasing your compassion and understanding of one another will help deepen your bond and help you feel more empowered to face whatever lies ahead.
You can have a space to talk about expectations.
It’s easy to make assumptions about what the other wants and/or expects. Perhaps you even have some routines that work for your relationship. Sometimes our expectations shift as our relationships shift. Allowing therapy to be the space you touch base about what each other’s expectations are and what you hope for your futures can be incredibly beneficial for your relationship. A therapist is there to help advocate for the health of your relationship. We all have opinions as to how to handle the bigger things in a marriage (finances, family planning and growing, romance, etc.). Most therapists will have questions prepared for you and your partner, so that you can answer these questions separately. This gives you the ability to see what values and opinions overlap, and which you may disagree with. From here, a therapist can steer you and your partner towards compromise.
You’ll better understand each other’s differences.
By now, you can likely list many of your partner’s little quirks--we all have them! Understanding that there are likely “why’s” behind your partner’s quirks can deepen relational safety between you and your partner. As relational safety and communication deepens, then the intimacy between the two of you is nurtured. Even if you are used to living together, it’s so easy to not emotionally connect as much as we think we may be--especially during wedding planning!
Premarital therapy is a space for you and your partner to build deeper relational equity. Remember that going to therapy does not have to mean that something is wrong or needs to be fixed. It’s the time to do a check-in with a professional who knows how to help you best. So, while it may seem a little traditional to seek premarital counseling, we hope you’ll reconsider the benefits!
Ready to try premarital counseling? Be sure to contact the Atlanta Therapeutic Collective and schedule your first appointment. We look forward to hearing from you!